And I DO NOT want to do it.
Not because I am not completely smitten with most definitely the cutest baby IN THE WORLD. Because I am.
Not because we are not getting into routine and learning to live life as a family of three.
Because we sort-of are.
Not because Little Man is not growing leaps and bounds and learning new milestones daily.
Because he is.
But rather because of pride. Silly Pride. We celebrated one-month-home in the hospital battling the notorious winter villain- RSV.
Pridefully, I wanted to show you a happy healthy family. To display how adoption changes lives.
Ohh prideful heart. It whispers- "you failed" and taunts me with an absurd "is this really better?"
YES. YES. WAY BETTER.
For ALL of us.
When we met Little Man, we were pretty sure he was deaf. No exaggeration here. We left the orphanage after our first long visit and started talking about what this means for us as a family. For the next week we would clap loudly, snap everywhere, make sudden noises and wait for his response. Nothing. We were so certain of our "diagnosis" that we even got excited about the idea of our family being able to communicate with sign language during awkward moments, in elevators, at church or across the room. Little Man did not respond to sound throughout our visits in the Ukraine. In a short 7 months, he had learned to tune the world out.
Now he startles when I drop a pan in the kitchen. He notices when his cousin begins to cry in the next room. He turns around to see who is clapping and causing a racket. He is learning to babble, grunt, laugh and ohhhhhhh yeah, he is learning to cry and express his frustrations. Which I am having to keep reminding myself is BEAUTIFUL. (hmmmm at 3 am someone might need to remind me of that)
He is becoming an attention hog- and he deserves to be one!
It is not better because of what I am doing. Or what Hubs is doing. Or Mimi. Or Gramm.
I am making more than my share of rookie mistakes. I would tattoo "New Mom" on my head but I am pretty sure it is already there by the stares I get while trying to figure out to get my son in the carseat and unload my basket of groceries in the parking lot.
It is better because we are together. God brought us together to work this life out as a family. And this, my friends, is way better than working it out solo.
No contest- I am now mom of the CUTEST BABY IN THE WORLD. I love telling every person I met that. Every nurse, doctor, respiratory therapist and social worker had to agree with me because, as you can see below, how could they not? :) How blessed am I?
And unlike the 2 months he spent in the hospital right before he met us, this time he was not alone. Not for one second.
Take that RSV.
Take that Pride.
THIS IS BETTER.